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28 September 2007

Pissing Humour

 

Can you spot what's wrong with this picture?

Make a guess before you scroll down for the answer and the story that goes with it.

Ready?

Let's scroll down.

















 

Realising that we weren't going to make it back in time for dinner with the rest of the tournament participants, we decided to pull over at one of the restaurants along the street to stop for dinner.

So while the rest of the party were settling down at the table, AP (the guy in the cap and bermudas) and I headed to the rest room to take a leak for we have been stuck in the car for close to 2 hours. Besides, we also needed to wash our hands prior to dinner too.

As I was washing my hands, AP started swearing and cursing all the Cantonese expletives, the natural reaction for me would be to quickly turned around to see what happened and I found myself bursting into hysterical laughter.

AP was pissing all over his shoes as the urinal was not connected to the pipe below! I could have sworn that his pair of burgundy New Balance sneakers was a shade more orange as a result of the "yellow dye".
What happened next was even funnier.

AP, still cursing and swearing non-stop, shifted to adjacent urinal while in midstream and pissing across the wall in the process. WTF??!!

I can only sketch what I saw here for :
  1. by the time I whipped out my camera, it would have been all over anyway and,
  2. AP would kill me if he caught me taking picture of him pissing.
The rest of the party who went in after us were complaining about the rest room, for there was piss everywhere.

AP and I kept really quiet throughout dinner. 

- Voxeros

1. Chocolate gal left...
Friday, 28 September 2007 1:42 pm
Muahhhaaa... use this to blackmail him :p


2. JayWalk left...
Friday, 28 September 2007 2:41 pm :: 
Chocolate: Don't want lah.... good friend mah.... shhhhh......


3. Chocolate gal left...
Friday, 28 September 2007 4:46 pm
ok ok... 偷偷的勒索啦... hehehe


4. JayWalk left...
Saturday, 29 September 2007 10:07 am :: 
Chocolate: Nah....


5. Winsor left...
Saturday, 29 September 2007 12:40 pm :: http://winsor.blogspot.com
hahaha! Damn! This is funny! Why can't your friend like hold his pee then make the move??


6. JayWalk left...
Saturday, 29 September 2007 12:57 pm :: 
Winsor: I believe that once pee is out, you can't stop it. Why don't you try it at home and then come back here with your findings?


7. nadnut left...
Sunday, 30 September 2007 2:45 am
aiyoh! tsk tsk. btw your sketch very nice!


8. JayWalk left...
Sunday, 30 September 2007 10:20 am :: 
nadnut: Definitely not my best work. I wanted to redo and improve on the "piss across the wall" but alas iLazy.

But hey, that's what you get for 2 minutes of effort. I always adopt the mantra. Mai Hiam Buay Pai.


9. Winsor left...
Wednesday, 3 October 2007 12:40 pm :: http://winsor.blogspot.com
jay, i always thought that it could be done. it's like a toilet palour trick, to urinal-hop, without spillage. haha!


10. Everton left...
Wednesday, 3 October 2007 1:11 pm
don't know how old your friend is. it could be an early sign of enlarging prostate gland :-(
should train him like our old dog bunny (ha ha)...pee at one spot!!!!


11. JayWalk left...
Wednesday, 3 October 2007 2:51 pm :: 
Winsor: Won't work for me dude. When it's out, even a vice clamp won't stop it.

Everton: I doubt if he has a prostate problem. He is around my age. Btw, our old dog is Barney. Not bunny. Imagine a dog named after a rabbit. Oh the shame!


12. Rachel left...
Thursday, 11 October 2007 5:33 pm :: http://www.xtralicious.com
Wah lau!!! LOLOL damn gross can..


13. Winsor left...
Thursday, 11 October 2007 8:58 pm :: http://winsor.blogspot.com
vice clamp! hahahaha!
I LOL'd... i think i alarmed my mum.


14. JayWalk left...
Friday, 12 October 2007 2:44 am :: 
Rachel: What would you have done then? Either way, the pee is going to be all over the place.

Winsor: Well, there is an old hokkien saying that goes "Gin nah zhuar guei kuey. Lao lang di dio eh. 小孩洒过溪，老人滴到鞋."

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27 September 2007

Tree Roots


As I was writing about my visit to the tree root carving village, I spotted this place and some of the unique root formations.

These are 2 separate roots and they formed 2 Ch1nese word characters. Can you guessed what they are?
The smaller one on the left is the word 福 (happiness) and the bigger one on the right is the word 寿 (longevity). Did anyone managed to see it?

So I guess it is perfectly natural to put these two words together to form the phrase of blessing 福寿.

Question. What do you think this is? Divine message or merely a rare coincidence?

I choose to believe that it is the latter. A mere coincidence which brings me to the hoo-hah in Jurong West recently, where people found image of the Monkey God on the bark of a tree and another Hindu deity look-alike at the root of another tree.

With all due respect to the various religions, I think we are taking the Jesus-On-Toast fiasco a tad too far. It got so bad that the worshipping went deep into the night and causing traffic jams on that street, much to the displeasure of the local residents. So far, I think the person with the greatest blessing would the ice-cream man and his mobile refrigerator cart.

Qiaoyun has covered this on her blog. Click here to read all about it.

Here's the thing. People see what they want/hope/wish to see. Remember how we used to stare up at the clouds when we were kids and then starting to see familiar shapes form by the white gaseous fluff of water vapour?

Hey! Look up there! It's a bunny! It's a sheep! It's a KFC Crispy left side chicken breast with an upsized cup of rootbeer! 

Apologies if I appear to mock but isn't the Monkey God a fictional character? It would have been far more credible if you say you saw GuanYin (观音) or Ma Tsu (妈祖) but Monkey God Sun WuKong? That's a character from an old Ch1nese folklore! No?

Anyway, I shall quit my skeptic criticism here before people start pelting stones or issue a fatwa (or any other religious equivalent) on my life. It wasn't the main jist of this entry, anyway.

Instead, I saw something deeper in this and I don't like what I saw.

The massive throngs of devotees rushing to pray for blessing at such fervour is alarming. It tells of something wrong.

Don't bury your head and deny it for what I said is true. I was a regular church-going Chr1stian when I was living in Singapore and I can honestly tell you that church attendance is always fuller in times of recession and/or desperation and I am sure this is probably the same situation across all the religions.

Ahh... such is the nature of the human race.

So what can be wrong in the island that we call home? The stock index is shooting through the roof, our Gahmen are releasing positive numbers of the jobs that they have created and the impressive percentage number of our economic growth, quarter after quarter. What can be wrong?

Yet, judging from what I hear and see (from pictures), devotees are rushing to pray at a desperate fervour.

Is something wrong? Or is something going to be wrong?

Please. Go think about it.

- Voxeros

1. Chocolate gal left...
Thursday, 27 September 2007 2:47 pm
i think they just want to win toto or 4D....


2. JayWalk left...
Thursday, 27 September 2007 3:35 pm :: 
Jaschocolate: I doubt if the God(s) would grant wishes of greed.


3. barffie left...
Friday, 28 September 2007 2:34 pm
Monkey God is long seen as a diety lor.


4. JayWalk left...
Friday, 28 September 2007 2:51 pm :: 
Barffie: Which is ironic considering the fact that Sun WuKong was a character created and featured in the classical Ch1nese epic novels of 大闹天宫 and 西游记 i.e. fiction.


5. aurore left...
Sunday, 30 September 2007 8:39 am :: http://aurore.vefblog.net
c'est vraiment joli...sorry...it's wonderfull !! I like all wood kiss jaywalk


6. JayWalk left...
Sunday, 30 September 2007 10:24 am :: 
Aurore: Bon jour! Yes, I have always enjoyed the marvels of nature but are we destroying too many of nature's gift at too fast a rate in the name of "enjoyment"?

Frankly, I prefer to enjoy nature as it is i.e. a forest trail or a beach head etc.
 
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26 September 2007

Root Sculpting


Continuing from my earlier entry where I was in GuiLin, we stopped by a village en route back to the hotel. This was no ordinary village. This was a village that specialises in root sculpting i.e. carvings and sculptures of tree roots. The thing about some of these villages here is that you sometimes get the whole village involved in a single trade as a mean to make a living for all the families living inside. Remember my earlier entry about SiJiu (四九) Town? Same concept, different product.

As I opened my car door after being stuck in the car all air conditioned and stuffy, I was hit by the refreshing scent of Camphor wood (樟木). It very much reminded me of Grandpa's house in Ta!pei where camphor wood furniture was and still is very popular among the elder Ta!wanese generations.

For a moment, I thought I was back in Grandpa's home as I haven't had this pleasant bouquet flirting with my olfactory senses in a long time.

Just to show how big one of these roots can be, I took this picture with my buddy AP (white shirt and bermudas) standing next to it to give you an idea. If this was merely the root of the tree, can you imagine how big the tree was?


Perhaps this was the piéce de résistance where, again my lovely assistant, AP, has again kindly volunteered* to model for me. For this particular root, it was sawed in half due to its sheer size, which would explain the flat bottom. So in actual fact, this root was in reality, double in size of what you see here.

* Well, I kinda volunteered him without him knowing. =P

I was thinking to myself how many years it took for this tree to grow to such majestic magnitude and yet in the name of human consumption, it was felled in a matter of minutes.

I was also thinking how the heck did these tree loggers managed to get the tree out to this village? Think for a moment, for a tree to be this big, it has got to be very far from civilisation, probably smack in the middle of some deep forest somewhere. Away from civilisation means no roads for the heavy transport to get in to retrieve the tree and no roads for the tree to be transported out. So how did this tree managed to end up here.

My guess is possibly the sheer will power of the human labour. You have got to respect the Spitlanders for pulling this off, even though what they did is not exactly very eco-friendly but I digress.


(Click Each Picture To Enlarge)

Camphor is the wood of choice due to the beauty of its natural burl and scent but other woods like Spruce are also used by less popular.

Most of the sculptings are either dioramas or figure carvings of folklore figures (like the 18 LuoHans, laughing monk), animals (dragon, phoenix, tigers, eagles), religious deities (Buddha and Goddess of Mercy GuanYin) as well as a traditional Ch1nese tea (泡茶) table set.

The last shot at the bottom shows a diorama in the making and it stretched all the way from the foreground to the back where the windows was. Can you say L-A-R-G-E?

- Voxeros

1. aloe left...
Thursday, 27 September 2007 11:37 am
That's HUGE!! Are they commissioned to do it or they just do and see who comes along to buy it?


2. JayWalk left...
Thursday, 27 September 2007 12:55 pm :: 
Aloe: I think it's a combination of each but I would guess that it would mostly be "do first sell later" as they have to work according to each individual root.

Commissioned deals means that the client specifies what he wants in advance but given that you don't know what you are going to get (the shape and type of root), it is very difficult to promise anything to the customer.


3. hiaoauntie left...
Thursday, 27 September 2007 1:02 pm
i think the roots look pretty scary... what with the tentacles and all.... i wonder where the buyer will put it??? cannot be in the living room rite???? garden perhaps?


4. JayWalk left...
Thursday, 27 September 2007 1:46 pm :: 
hiaoauntie: Tentacles??!!? WTF?? Eh... I think it's time you cut down on your hentai liao....

These sculptures are definitely indoor types for the roots will not be able to withstand the elements of weathering after the sculpture is complete. Definitely, for display in the hall or lobby of some major building or some super duper rich man's mansion.


5. hiaoauntie left...
Friday, 28 September 2007 1:38 am
i think your imagination is more vivid than mine... seriously i am not thinking about hentai... in fact, i am thinking more about nightmares... ghost and spirit and stuff


6. JayWalk left...
Friday, 28 September 2007 9:45 am :: 
hiaoauntie: Horror hentai???!!! OMG, you are more hardcore than I imagined!


7. slurp! left...
Sunday, 7 October 2007 11:58 am
*speeches* i guess the profits must have been good. They will do ANYTHING for money! Even to the extend of destroying their own environment & feng shui. *sighz*


8. JayWalk left...
Monday, 8 October 2007 1:45 am :: 
slurp!: Let's face it, the entire, if not most, village population is probably illiterate and as such would be clueless to impact on environment and all that.

That reminds me of a book that I have and would recommend to you. Collapse: How Societies Choose to Fail or Succeed by Jared Diamond
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25 September 2007

Mystery Trees and Pools


Before anyone read any further, try to answer the following question.

What you see is a pool of water sculpted into a pond using concrete. There are sticks above it forming what looks like the skeletal structure of a tent roof. Pardon the picture quality for it is taken in a moving car and I was sitting on the wrong side.

This was taken in a farm. Guess what's inside the pond?

Make a guess first and I shall reveal it as I trudge along with this entry.


As many were aware, I was in GuiLin over the weekend for a golf tournament but I decided to skip the first day of practice round to go visit a supplier there.

The factory was right at the outskirt of the city and you could tell almost immediately where the city ends and where the rural side starts. When we made a right turn off the main concrete road, we immediately found our car bouncing up and down the gravel path. Ah... the end of the city limits.

It was a small path with farm houses on one side of the path and farms on the other side, lining the entire length.

There were a few strange observations:
  1. You don't see anyone around. It seemed as if nobody was working.
  2. From what I can see, this is a orchard but unlike most orchards that I've seen, this one look very messy and unkempt. You know this is still an active orchard as it is still quite a long way away from abandonment. Very strange considering the trees are planted haphazardly when you would otherwise expect a neat layout for efficient harvesting and tight layout for maximum number of trees per square foot of land.
  3. Then there were these artificial ponds which initially I thought was a water reservoir for irrigation purposes. However, I was told otherwise as it was a pond for rearing.
"Rearing what?" I asked. "Fish? Shrimp? Tortise?"

"Nothing." my host answered matter-of-factly. "They were built to rear nothing."

As it turned out, the land that we were on was earmarked to be taken back by the Gahmen as the city continues to expand. The fact that we were on the immediate outskirts means that acquisition of the land is just round the corner.

Farmers are compensated according to the type of farm that they own. According to the compensation guidelines, fish farms and fruit orchards are entitled to a higher rate of compensation as compared to say, a piece of land for farming of certain crops e.g. lettuce or radish or yam.

As such, these farmers rushed to plant fruits trees and built ponds without really intending to genuinely farm it. These fruit trees and fish ponds were just symbolic representation of fruit orchards and fish farms respectively, which would translate into more moolah during the acquisition compensation.

- Voxeros

1. hitomi left...
Tuesday, 25 September 2007 8:23 pm
last time my uncles oso did similar things before we were made to move from our kampong. plant fruit trees, do up concrete ground etc... to get more compensation from gahmen. it's in the chinese blood lah.


2. JayWalk left...
Wednesday, 26 September 2007 2:08 am :: 
hitomi: Frankly, I don't know enough to make a judgment call here. On one hand, it appears that the farmers are cheating the Gahmen, but on the other hand, it could mean that the farmers are trying to get back at the Gahmen in view of the less-than-fair compensation.


3. Sly left...
Wednesday, 26 September 2007 9:33 am :: http://www.myveryownslyblog.blogspot.com
Yup, my family also did that when we were make to move from our kampong house to HDB a long time ago. We had planted lots of fruit trees, especially papayas.


4. JayWalk left...
Wednesday, 26 September 2007 9:50 am :: 
Sly: Hmm.... sounds to me this is common practice for everyone.


5. Pam left...
Wednesday, 26 September 2007 4:15 pm
Clearly...we know less than we think with regards to what 'the rest of the world' does..!
I realised this yesterday when friends came over and we were talking about the usual benefit frauders out there... and the mindset these people have (generations of people not working, therefore growing up on govt handouts and not thinking anything wrong with having holidays and plasma tvs courtesy of the govt and the rest of us).. v different from ours. I'd just found out yesterday that if one was a single mother and unemployed, the govt just gives you £500 cash (to help pay for baby expenses). not bad huh, given that there are people out there who work damn hard as supermarket check out people etc, ALSO to earn £500 after tax.
but I digress......


6. JayWalk left...
Thursday, 27 September 2007 10:10 am :: 
Pam: Again the never ending debate between the merits of a republican (conservative) vs a democrat (labour).

The ideal democrat is a better option IMHO where everyone is being taken care off i.e. no one left behind. However, the problem is that we have too many people taken unfair advantage of this and milking the system for all it's worth, at the expense of others.

Hence the republican's theory of meritocracy stipulates that you get what you work for i.e. the good old "a day's wages for a day's work" in the aim to leave behind those who chose not to keep up. However, in a world where nothing is perfect, it may mean leaving behind those who are geniunely unable to keep up.


7. slurp! left...
Sunday, 7 October 2007 11:33 am
Brilliant! Yes, milk the gahmen while they still can :D IMHO, compensate from gahmen are mostly not fair one lah.


8. JayWalk left...
Monday, 8 October 2007 1:38 am :: 
slurp!: I guess when both sides cancel out each other with their respective cheating, the deal even out nicely at the end of the day.
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24 September 2007

Yellow W&W


I was at the ShenZhen airport heading to my boarding gate as I was leaving for the GuiLin tournament when I spotted this en route.

It's the Yellow M&M's long lost evil twin!!!

It's the Yellow W&W!!!!

Welcome to Spitland where we have fakes and imitations all over the place. While they say that imitation is the best form of flattery, l say lousy forgeries with the lamest of efforts is definitely hands-down the best form of insult.

Really bad job here as I cringed while taking a photo of it.

This reminded me of one of those "dumb blonde" jokes.

Q: Why was the dumb blonde fired from the M&M factory?
A: She rejected all the candies with the "W"s printed on it.

Hmm.... maybe it wasn't a joke after all.... hmm....
- Voxeros
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19 September 2007

Imposter!


Yetterday, nadnut msn me to ark if I got comment on her blog leecently. This girl hor, I tell you, forever ark funny funny question one. Chor limpeh blur blur. I am her lumber ONE fan wor. Op course I got comment lor. Then she ark me to go lead one particular comment.

I was like HAR? Ark me go leed my own comment? I know lah. Consperm must be this girl want me to go there and collect my speowling and grammar one. Then later must type out 10 times as collection. This nadnut I tell you hor, sometimes belly anal one.

BUT, being the nice guy that I always is hor (stop gagging!), I eng siew her by going to her blog. Yah lah... she these days the blog like nobody leed liao, so the visitor hits drop like siao. So pretend pretend ark me go see my comment on her blog. Like that then can cheat the NuffNang peeple extra 20 cent mah. Creber girl this one.
When I got there, I saw only the top where I commented and I said yah lah... that's me lah. Engerand belly goot what... what the porblem? Then she ark me to schloll down some more to comment lumber sex*.

* In nadnut blog, she collected the name liao but as you can see the orgeegeener comment is captured above.

I schloll down and I saw the above. Lim peh see aleady blur kee.

KNN, who pretend pretend me to write the comment one?

I tell you at that time hor, I is super DU LAN liao....

MY ENGERAND GOT SO BAD MEH?!!?

So I tell this nadnut, this one consperm not me. The engerand standard so lao-yar. How can be me? Cannot be me lah. Lucky nadnut agree with me and say she also suspect that's why msn me to consperm. Otherwise, I consperm sure flip-face (and flip table) with her one.

Then hor, I think think hor. Funny leh.... op all the peeple to pretend, why me? This fella not only only use my name, put in my URL but also type in my email lumber leh. A lot of effort leh. So hor, I lecide to pray detective and anal-lice the comment. I concrude that this one is char bor coz she got use the "=X" smirey. Only char bors will use that one (chao ah guars not counted). Then also flom the way she type the comment, I tink quite yewkee one lah. Prolly still schooling, wearing uniform one... iLike...... wait wait... I digress. Ok ok... maybe not so yewkee.... but at most also up to poly only.

Acherly on a normal day, she would have gotten away with it. But hor there is one flaw in this charbor's sabo plan lah. The whole world know my engerand is lumber one tok kong one! Who would bereef that above is litten by me? So I concrude that this one is new bird.

Ok, I say finish liao. Tank cue for listening. Bye bye.

- Voxeros

1. naeboo left...
Wednesday, 19 September 2007 5:42 pm :: http://naeboo.liquidblade.com
dig hee yoose ur URL to pleten two bee yoo? if not, mebbe juz using same nick mah


2. Chocolate gal left...
Wednesday, 19 September 2007 9:47 pm
U bery bery famose mah.. everybodi want to be u mah... _


3. r3gular left...
Wednesday, 19 September 2007 11:07 pm :: http://r3gular.wordpress.com/
Aiiiyaa.. Ish your fans lllor! Nowadehs orh, people bery bery free, nothing to loo ma...


4. JayWalk left...
Wednesday, 19 September 2007 11:52 pm :: 
nadnut: Dounch noe leh. I dounch tink that she used my nick lor coz where got so zhun my blog url and email lumber same same one?


5. JayWalk left...
Thursday, 20 September 2007 12:11 am :: 
chocolategal: prease lah... so many lagi more famoose blogger wor? Go pletend to be Bandung Vader lagi better right?


r3gular: Liew... nothing to do go PCC or something lor. Why sabo me?


6. nadnut left...
Thursday, 20 September 2007 12:27 am
lol. stupid person la. anonymous coward.


7. JayWalk left...
Thursday, 20 September 2007 10:43 am :: 
nadnut: I will delete comments if they are not constructive. So far, I have been fortunate not needing to take such drastic actions around here and everybody is pretty friendly and civil.


8. Bellatrix Lestrange left...
Thursday, 20 September 2007 12:07 pm
I told you before right, dont anyhow go buaya young girls esp Ah Lians.. Who ask u dun wanna listen.. See lah.. kena imposter liaos.. The Next thing we know got rip off blog call Gaywalk.... :P


9. JayWalk left...
Thursday, 20 September 2007 12:45 pm :: 
Bellatrix: Oh prease. Those Ah Lians I buaya one all staydee won't do this type of ting one. Don't bereef? Ask all my Ah Lians and they will tell you they all treat me good good one.

Lim Peh is uber male to the max one. Even if some joker set up gaywalk blog, nobody will bereef that it is the real me. I have MAN-ness overflowing out of my ears one.


10. akk left...
Thursday, 20 September 2007 1:28 pm
scarly it's nadnut's own fren, trying to deflect the situation.


11. JayWalk left...
Thursday, 20 September 2007 2:19 pm :: 
akk: I suspect hor that the leader noes this nadnut one and she also lead me, otherwise where she get my email lumber to key in on nadnut blog comment?


12. Bellatrix Lestrange left...
Thursday, 20 September 2007 9:08 pm
I Bereef your Ah Lians all Steady one But hor I dont BEREEEF u Uber Male.... cos u EEYER too much :P


13. JayWalk left...
Friday, 21 September 2007 12:03 am :: 
Bellahlian: Eeyer.... why you say me until liddat. Lim peh si kan puar choo teng UBER MALE hor!


14. Ruok left...
Monday, 24 September 2007 10:28 am
wah joo sho femes got pplez wants to iimpeshnonate joo ah? I ish jeles.


15. JayWalk left...
Monday, 24 September 2007 11:14 am :: 
rouk: Dounch anyhowly say me lah.... make peepur shy only.
 
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18 September 2007

Chelsea + Balestier = Chelestiar


Yes, it's a guy's name and yes, that was how the name came about.

I rolled my eyes when I heard that initiall but I felt guilty after that. I will explain it later.

I saw the second half of this clip on Youtube last year and I only just realised that there was an earlier segment prior to the BandungVader-YellowTrunk "blind date" (man are they are going to have so many beautiful children together or what? ... *sniff*).

Anyway, we were having our usual banter on the CowboyBar when TK brought this clip to my attention via YoungJedi's blog.

So anyway, we have this guy whose name is strange enough to make you sit up and watch the clip closer and whoa! He is an author of a self-help book in dating! A love guru! Well, this guy, whom by now should have graduated med school (wah... doctor leh!), was picked to be the candidate to go on a blind date with the show's co-host.

My burning question is if Chelestiar knew that the program was out to make him a fool? I have a feeling that the poor chap didn't know how the episode would turn out after all the post-production editing. He was portrayed as some big super loser trying to date some TV personality and perhaps a cruel prank at his expense? And perhaps a weird way of poetic justice to take him to task for writing a dating self-help book and undertaking the role of the Love Doctor?

If you ask me, whoever behind this idea of getting Chelestiar humiliated on national TV ought to be shot and burn in hell.

Ok, so his looks is nowhere near Brad Pitt nor his charm within George Clooney's radar range. But for heaven's sake, he is a person with feelings and self-esteem too. Can these bigots be anymore insensitive?

Wait. Am I the only person to feel that Chelestiar has been undeservingly slighted. Have we become a world of insensitive bigots whose only source of joy comes from humiliating a fellow human being?

Come on. That was definitely not a "laughing with you" kind of situation. It was blatantly a "laughing at you" episode. Does MediaCorp need to stoop so low to score ratings?


There is no hope for local TV. God bless cable.
 
Yes, I admit when I cringed and rolled my eyes when I heard the name initially but you know what? All rolled eyeballs will roll back to the front at the end of the day and if this person wants to be known as Chelestiar Kong, then so be it. I will respect that decision. Eyeballs only rolled back once. That's the rule. Accept the person for who he is. I believe he is a good person at heart and I think that counts for more than a caked-up face.

Then there is the YellowTrunked one. I believe he knows what he was getting himself into during filming and I would not comment any further. Besides, he is a veteran at bizarre publicity and I think he is old bird enough to hold his own.

I do not disapprove of the YellowTrunked's antics. If those were what he wanted to do then so be it. I am probably of the type where I would say "Hey you. This is the line with you on that side and me on this. As long as you do whatever the hell you want to do on your side, that is fine by me. I will not be interested and neither do I want to get involved but it doesn't mean that I disapprove cause I am in not position to  judge."

To each his/her own, I would say.

- Voxeros

1. Everton left...
Wednesday, 19 September 2007 11:18 am
Maybe I lack a sense of humor, I did not find the show funny at all. The show is a copycat of some cheap low budget American dating shows. Chelestair is an innovative name, but my name Everton sounds 10 times better :-)

I can't stand Asians bleach/dye their hair blond because it looks very weird and unnatural. I am surrounded by ang moh colleagues and students everyday. My black hair makes me stand out and I am proud of Asian heritage!


2. JayWalk left...
Wednesday, 19 September 2007 11:51 am :: 
Everton: This is the sad state of local TV these days.

Anyway, this weird and unnatural blonde that you speak of is X1axue aka XX aka Xia Suay or Wendy Cheng or as I would call her the Bandung Vader due to her "everything also pink" website.

She like the village bigot in the local blogging community whose unfortunate popularity scored her a gig on TV. We are all so happy for her.


3. Ed, Edd & Eddy left...
Wednesday, 19 September 2007 1:15 pm :: http://eddyteo.blogspot.com/
Exactly the reason I don't watch local TV. I watch drama series like 24, Heroes for my entertainment needs. The locally produced variety shows are just two boring.


4. JayWalk left...
Wednesday, 19 September 2007 2:23 pm :: 
Ed: Sad state of Singapore TV. In Spitland, their programs may be downright boring but at least they are not dumb.


5. Ruok left...
Monday, 24 September 2007 10:22 am
I, also sad. They more femes than me. >.<


6. JayWalk left...
Monday, 24 September 2007 11:16 am :: 
rouk: If yellow trunks can get you so far, you need to beat that by taking it all off on youtube liao!


7. Pam left...
Tuesday, 25 September 2007 8:31 pm
OMG - I've only had time to see this now....... this is so cringe-worthy.... are Singaporean men really that hopeless?!?!?! Tihs can't be real...can it??


8. Pam left...
Tuesday, 25 September 2007 8:38 pm
I've just seen the '2nd part'.... OMG... why the heck does she have 'blonde' hair???? I mean, there are highlights, lowlights, but this?!?!?!? this must be a spoof...it can't be real... or rather, these characters can't be for real!!! OMG OMG.... and on a related note, I just saw a student today, quite obviously asian... with blonde hair. it looked so fake (esp next to my secretary who is a REAL blonde)... it was ridiculous.


9. JayWalk left...
Wednesday, 26 September 2007 2:05 am :: 
Pam: I believe that while the guy is for real, it is somewhat an exaggerated candidate for the sake of boosting ratings. The level MediaCorp is willing to stoop to is most disappointing.

I supposed to them, Blonde is fun and given the general conservative nature of Asians, perhaps they trying to make a statement. Actually there is also a Youtube clip of her getting a tattoo on her wrist. Her moniker in English translate to Snowfall and so she got herself a real tattoo of a snowflake. One of those symbols you find in the air-conditioning's "Cool" mode.

Sigh.... there is no hope for this girl.
 
Posted by at No comments:

15 September 2007

Big Fish


Got an sms from the Towkay-neo of a nearby Teochew restaurant telling us to come down as they have a 200 斤 Grouper for the weekend.

Initially, I misheard it as 公斤(kilogram) and was thinking holy mackerel! (grouper in this case), that is more than 3 of me!

Anyway, as it turned out, the sms said 200 斤 which worked out to be 100kgs. Still a heck of a big fish by my count.

We got to the restaurant the following evening with the fish proudly on display. The official weigh-in stood at 134kgs (268 斤).

How to eat this fish? Well, we didn't have a choice on account of the fact that this was a Teochew steamboat restaurant that specialises in Grouper. So what other way then to eat it steamboat style?

Before, anyone gasped how we were able to eat up the fish, we can't. The fish was meant for the restaurant's weekend business. We were told that the fish was originally planned for Friday, Saturday and Sunday but given that business was so good. The fish won't make it past Saturday's dinner crowd.

The fish was fresh and very juicy. The skin itself is about 1/2 inch thick and chewy. Alas the highlight of the night was the last course where everything inside the steamboat was scooped up and in their place, white rice, ginger, and lotsa pepper to make porridge.

Very sweet.


Something about Grouper or in Ch1nese 石斑鱼 here. Some people spell it as Garoupa or Groper but essentially, they all point to the same fish sans the sub-species variations.

One may ask that a grouper of this size would have been rare and wouldn't it risk extinction, given our idiotic tendency to over fish? Fortunately, big groupers are common and this particular sub-species of the grouper family is not on the endangered list. Furthermore, now that their natural enemy's, the shark, population is fast being decimated as a result of an over active sharks' fin trade, this grouper sub-species population is set to boom.

Unfortunately, this can't be said for their cousin, the Goliath Grouper, which is currently classified as Critically Endangered. These GCs can go all the way up to 700+kgs and the good news is that the population numbers are starting to look good, albeit slow. Let's keep our fingers' crossed.

- Voxeros

1. aloe left...
Monday, 17 September 2007 9:52 am
imagine... a 200kg Garouper will be abt 1.5 times the size of this one.... waaahhhh!!! *slurps*
But urm.... I wouldn't like to eat the skin. =P


2. JayWalk left...
Monday, 17 September 2007 11:42 am :: 
aloe: The skin supposed got some dunno what they call it which is supposedly good for the joints. Also the fats in there is high in Omega-3.


3. JayWalk left...
Monday, 17 September 2007 11:57 am :: 
aloe: Ok, I found out the "dunno what they call it". I was refering to Collagen which is supposedly very good for a person's joint mobility.


4. Ed, Edd & Eddy left...
Monday, 17 September 2007 12:58 pm :: http://eddyteo.blogspot.com/
Wow, that'a really huge fish! I didn't know that Grouper can grow to this size. What does it eat to get to this size man...
And 700+ Goliath Grouper?! That's like a monster. Or a small whale.


5. Kelly left...
Monday, 17 September 2007 1:11 pm :: http://www.kellchan.blogspot.com/
I like soupy fish porridge... plus lots of Chilli Padi.
Yum Yum...


6. JayWalk left...
Monday, 17 September 2007 1:58 pm :: 
Ed: Well, we don't see a lot of them here in SG coz restaurants usually don't have big enough fish tanks to keep them. The restaurant probably bought the fish already frozen and cut up.


7. JayWalk left...
Monday, 17 September 2007 2:01 pm :: 
Kell: Yeah.... chilli padi is a must!!!

Btw, that reminds me of this joke.

Q: Who is beehoon's biggest enemy?
A: The Fish because 鱼骗米粉.


8. Bellatrix Lestrange left...
Monday, 17 September 2007 11:17 pm
Kauz.. Damn COLD lei your joke....


9. aloe left...
Tuesday, 18 September 2007 9:25 am
yah, collagen and omega 3. I prefer to take those in tablet or pill form though cos I really dun like to eat "skins" =S =P Er.. that joke hor... dun know how long ago le... =P


10. JayWalk left...
Tuesday, 18 September 2007 9:56 am :: 
Bellatrix: Aiyah. The joke also I read from somewhere one lah. So serious for what?

Q: 哪一个动物常常跌倒？
A: 狐狸. 因为很脚滑.

Aloe: I don't really like the skin either coz many a times there are fishy smelly than tasty. Fortunately, this one was quite good and fresh.

Speaking of fish, I don't eat fresh water fish coz they have this muddy taste. I supposed sea water fish taste better. Cleaner water?


11. aloe left...
Tuesday, 18 September 2007 1:59 pm
Yah loh!! How come har!? Seawater fish taste better than fresh water fish... And fresh water fish got more bones... hmmm...


12. JayWalk left...
Tuesday, 18 September 2007 2:36 pm :: 
Aloe: You got me there for I have no answer to that. I am guessing it has a lot to do with the mud in fresh water?


13. Chocolate gal left...
Wednesday, 19 September 2007 9:54 pm
i dont like to eat fish at all..... unless it is xue yu cooked by my mom and fish and chips....


14. JayWalk left...
Thursday, 20 September 2007 12:15 am :: 
chocolategal: Then you might as well ask your mom to cook Bird's Eye Fish Fingers liao. That's cod (xue yu) for you.
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14 September 2007

Abductions In Spitland (Part 3 of 3)

Protected Entry. --> Click Here.
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13 September 2007

Abductions In Spitland (Part 2 of 3)

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12 September 2007

Abductions In Spitland (Part 1 of 3)

Protected Entry --> Click Here.
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11 September 2007

The Sushi Girl II

I have decided to declassify my earlier post "The Sushi Girl" and removed the password protection. So there. Knock yourselves out.

 
The Guy

It's been 2 months since Frank returned to Ta1wan and we haven't heard from him since. Not even a phone call or sms. We don't even see him on MSN either. To think we treated him like one of us and it is just weird that he vanished into thin air.

I can't help but feel that he has severed all ties with us and to think we threw him a farewell bbq the night before and making him promise to return after his national service stint (yes, he passed out again after 2 beers and no, we didn't invite The Sushi Girl this time).

Had it been any other person, I wouldn't have bothered with a second thought but here we had was a super nice guy who was warm, friendly and sweet until your toilet bowl gets infested with ants. This behavior from warm to Zero Kelvin cold has certainly taken us aback.

I asked the rest of the gang this question.

Was Frank a phony act from day 1?
 
Granted he was the only one not related to any of us and worked for one of our family businesses, we never did make that distinction (as in you employee, us employer) and treated him as part of the family. Heck, we even thought of pairing off with one of the sisters!

Anyway, I applaud him for the great pretense for he certainly had me fooled for 1+ year.

I don't think this guy will return to our lives any time soon, if ever.


The Girl

Hong disappeared shortly after as we found out that she left the sushi shop. It wasn't all that big a deal as restaurant staff turnovers are very common anyway and it is not like we are friends. Frank and her. Yes. She and us? Er.... not really.

Well, as fate would have it, we bumped into her again 2 weeks ago at another sushi restaurant and as we found out later, she left the old shop to come to the new one where the boss of the new restaurant poached her over with a managerial post and a better package.

Well, the new restaurant was so-so and not much different from the old one as far as food is concerned. Granted that the place is bigger and the decor is nicer, those external factors can only hold your interest for so long. Hong was kind enough to give us 40% discount (opening week promotion) that evening but even so, the bill was higher than if we were to dine at the old restaurant (20% discount over there for regulars customers).
So I guess if we are not going to return to this new restaurant anytime soon, I can take her off my book for now.

Hence, my decision to release The Sushi Girl into the open as I don't feel a need to protect their identities anymore since (a) nobody in my Spitland vicinity reads this and able to link it back to them and (b) I don't care since they no longer exist in my book?

Anyway, carrying on from that fateful night, nothing happened, much to the disappointment of everybody. Frank really really passed out that night. Wimp.

Nothing much was said about the morning after but I can only imagine the awkward conversation consisting of "Good morning.", "Bye, I'll see you around." and "I'll call you." in no particular order.

Oh well, like a bad chart-topping song like Macarena, Lambada or Lemon Tree. It came. It stayed. It left. It forgotten.

Image Credit: http://telstarlogistics.typepad.com

- Voxeros

1. hiaoauntie left...
Tuesday, 11 September 2007 11:29 pm
Err... may i know what is the point of this post?


2. JayWalk left...
Tuesday, 11 September 2007 11:51 pm :: 
Hiaoauntie: This is just a follow up to my earlier entry. Sort of an after-thought of sorts. The earlier entry was merely a journal entry of what happened that day. If you are looking for some sort of a "Moral of the Story" here, I'm afraid you are going to be sorely disappointed.


3. OLLie left...
Thursday, 13 September 2007 1:42 am
Oooh. Your sushi pic looks kinda good. Makes me feel like eating jap food. hahaha..


4. JayWalk left...
Thursday, 13 September 2007 9:45 am :: 
Ollie: Which one? The photo or the chalkboard?


5. OLLie left...
Thursday, 13 September 2007 8:20 pm :: http://ooohlah.lah.cc
Chalkboard!!


6. JayWalk left...
Friday, 14 September 2007 12:33 am :: 
Ollie: Oh .. thanks thanks.


7. akk left...
Friday, 14 September 2007 10:48 am
would be nice if something happened.....he needs to learn how to hold his drink. in any case, maybe he feel awkward around you guys, dunno where put his face, that's why din contact you all. or perhaps he decided he doesnt want to drink anymore and seeing you guys, being so fun, will tempt him into it again... so many reasons!


8. JayWalk left...
Friday, 14 September 2007 1:30 pm :: 
Akk: He finally called earlier this week like 2 months later. He is slated to enter NS next month. He said he was busy with stuff back home which is why he never called to stay in touch.

Whatever....
9. JF left...
Friday, 14 September 2007 4:15 pm
IMHPOV...well.. frenz come and go... like bus stations and buses... you dun get the same drivers on every route...
anyways.. u aso not on my msn.. jin cham leh


10. JayWalk left...
Friday, 14 September 2007 6:05 pm :: 
JF: True lah. We are aware of this. It's just that we expected him not to be one of these people which probably explained out disappointment lor.

For MSN, add me at voxeroshotmailcom
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10 September 2007

NB - Sibeh Long Meme wor!

I already have this big disdain for memes liao and this time I not only kena shoot another meme (again!) but a bladdy long and lor sor one!! *groan*

Wah raoz.... sibeh ma fan leh....

I don't want to do, can?

Cannot?

eeyer....

Ok lah. Given our "special relationship" hor. Ok lor. I do lah. *grumble grumble*


List out your top 5 birthday presents you wish for:
  • A pair of RTW air tickets. First Class, please.
  • Tickets to Wimbledon, Australian, US and French tennis opens.
  • Tickets to Old Trafford.
  • Tour of Scotland (including golf at St Andrews Old Course) and the various single-malt distilleries.
  • ..... er.... world peace?
Answer the following questions:
1. The person/people who tagged you is/are?
2. Your relationship with him/her is...
  • She wants to marry me.
3. Your 5 impressions of him/her...
  • Cute smile.
  • Silky hair...
  • ...on her moustache. Ok! Ok! Head! Head!
  • Beautiful eyes.
  • Heart of gold.
4. The most memorable thing he/she had done for you...
  • Buy 4D for me.
5. The most memorable words he/she had said to you...
  • eeyer...
6. If he/she becomes your lover, he/she will...
  • never let me have the chance to make it out of the room, ever.
7. If he/she becomes your lover, things he/she has to improve on will be...
  • the moustache Nothing.
8. If he/she becomes your enemy, you will...
  • MSN her mother "小姐, 一个人啊? 要不要做朋友?".
9. If he/she becomes your enemy, the reason will be...
  • She asked her dad to MSN me "小弟, 一个人啊? 要不要做朋友?".
10. The most desire thing you want to do for him/her now is...
  • Paint the centipede nice nice for her. Click Here .
11. Your overall impression of him/her is...
  • Sibeh hor pian.
12. How you think people around you will feel about you?
  • Siao ting tong.
13. The character you love of yourself are...
  • Ang moh buay pai, Ch1nese mah si eh sai. Sian char bor lagi lee hai
14. On the contrary, the characters you hate of yourself are...
  • I see pweety ger, I berry shy lor.....
15. The most ideal person you want to be is...
  • Gary. He see pweety ger one hor. He not shy one. Power.
16. For people that care and like you, say something to them...
  • 亲爱的朋友大家一起来！
  • 把所有一切烦恼都抛开！
  • 搞笑写作还有娱乐动态！
  • 锁定我这博客您别走开！
17. Pass this quiz to 10 persons that you wish to know how they feel about you...
  1. Lexandria - Jeet lang jeet puar. Kum cheng buay suar....
  2. Jean - 拔萝卜, 拔萝卜. 嘿哟! 嘿哟! 拔萝卜!...
  3. Joyce - This meme is real one! Nair bruff you! REALLY!
  4. Gary - I early early chope you to do this liao hor!
  5. R3gular - Come back we go lim jiu. ON lah!
  6. Sheena - Welcome back to blogging. Here's to getting you started.
  7. Red Queen - Get to work! *Whip! Whip!*
  8. KingMeng - Sell Berbatov to me leh....
  9. Qiaoyun - Something for you to do in between scenes.
  10. Little Dowager* - Do this or next time no more StyleMeter for you!
Who is No.6 having relationship with?
  • This one recently single again. Any takers? Lelong! Lelong!
Is No.9 a male or female?
  • This one berry pweety one. *shy* 
If No.7 and 10 are together, will it be a good thing?
How about No.8 and 5?
  • Guy and guy. Earlier is girl and girl. Am I the only one who is straight these days??
What is No.2 studying about?
  • Multimedia, design, multimedia design?
When was the last time you had a chat with No.3?
What kind of music band does No.8 like?
  • S.H.E.!!
Does No.1 has any siblings ?
  • Got 1 brother but that one really long story.
Will you woo No.3 ?
  • Of course! Take no prisoners!! 宁可杀错, 不可放过!
How about No.7 ?
  • This one ah..... can also but hor, I sure end up prisoner one.
Is No.4 single ?
  • Yes. Eh.... Sheena also single wor. You thinking what I thinking? Mai Too Liao!! Lai! Lai! Lelong! Lelong!
What is the surname of no.5?
  • Lin
What is the nickname of no.10?
  • CheeKo Soh
What is the hobby of no.4?
  • Fap fap fap.
Do no.5 and 9 get along well?
  • Wah raoz.... ChioBu leh... how not to get along?
Where is no.2 studying at?
  • Temasek Polytechnic
Talk something casually about no.1?
  • This one if you feed her gin and beer together hor. She happy like bird one and then go lalalalalala.....
Have you try developing feelings for no.8?
  • Cannot. Wait KM's girlfriend twist ear. Pain.
- Voxeros

1. OLLie left...
Sunday, 9 September 2007 12:35 pm :: http://ooohlah.lah.cc
MOUSTACHE?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
hahahhaa.. Eh. I don't want centipede or butterfly. I want nicer one! Cool cool design can anot? The centipede is damn ugly la.


2. Gary left...
Monday, 10 September 2007 12:40 am
wah.. i kana by you up down left right centre.. the way you listed the people is according to the question one.. look like i have to be a meme-killer liao..


3. Cheeko Soh AKA LD left...
Monday, 10 September 2007 2:54 am :: http://littledowager.blogsome.com
BUAHAHAHAHAH. YOU WILL GET SHY AROUND PRETTY GIRLS MEH?! HAHAHAHAH
Acherly, you mistaken me already. I'm acherly more lomantic than cheeko.


4. shelled left...
Monday, 10 September 2007 8:23 am :: http://shellylives.wordpress.com
Fwah. Really sibei long meme. Heng I not close to you so never kenna-ed. But shouldn't it be "亲爱" instead of "情爱"?? =p


5. JayWalk left...
Monday, 10 September 2007 9:26 am :: http://jaywalk.blog-city.com
Ollie: Eh... you last time say I draw centipede "until so chio somemore". Now say ugly. iHurted. Click Here For Evidence


Gary: To be honest, I did not look at the questions when I listed down the 10 people. Strangely, all the questions all fall into place nicely. Fated lah.

Little Dowager*: Wah... laugh until like that... *shy*

Shelled: Harlow. Long time no see. Thanks for pointing out the typo. That's 1 ch1nese typo in the entire entry. By ACS standard hor, that is sibeh miracle liao....... two more of these and the Pope lan lan must make me a Saint.


6. sunflower left...
Monday, 10 September 2007 9:38 am
Dont give me a MeMe to do when I come back to blog in next Jan...


7. OLLie left...
Monday, 10 September 2007 9:40 am :: http://ooohlah.lah.cc
My taste grown better over the years mah. wahahaha.. Stylish stylish one la. Onz?


8. JayWalk left...
Monday, 10 September 2007 10:25 am :: 
sunflower: Hopefully, I don't get any lor.

Ollie: Eh... how about I draw a new one. I have a great idea on the next design. Mushroom head on one end and two hairy rambutans on the other? Ai mai?


9. Bellatrix Lestrange left...
Monday, 10 September 2007 1:05 pm
Wah .. Sabo....


10. JayWalk left...
Monday, 10 September 2007 4:38 pm :: 
Bellatrix: I also kena sabo lor.... so if I going down hor, I taking you with me.


11. Bellatrix Lestrange left...
Monday, 10 September 2007 6:00 pm
Sorry... I not so close to you for me to accompany you to where you are going.. but don't worry i will burn more money for you when the time comes.... :P you want maid too???


12. JayWalk left...
Monday, 10 September 2007 6:50 pm :: 
Bellatrix: Er.... the maid chio one or not ah?


13. Bellatrix Lestrange left...
Monday, 10 September 2007 10:27 pm
Basket... Send u maid still hiam this hiam that.. all come in standard size one lah.. U make noise somemore, i burn u one tay si lang then u know :P


14. JayWalk left...
Monday, 10 September 2007 10:56 pm :: 
Bellatrix: Bor swee one, then I don't want liao.


15. Bellatrix Lestrange left...
Tuesday, 11 September 2007 9:02 am
Up to you lah.. u very fussy.... burn give you still hiam this hiam that.. Dont come comprain to me that i no good to u, I no burn maid for you....


16. Gary left...
Tuesday, 11 September 2007 9:48 am
eh.. hungry ghost festival close gate liao.. wait another year ba.. at the meantime, pls control your sexual behaviours..


17. JayWalk left...
Tuesday, 11 September 2007 10:41 am :: 
Bellatrix: I got minimum standard one ok!

Gary: My dear friend. I urge you to re-read every single comment here carefully and closely. There was never any connotation of a sexual context.

Keep it in your own pants, will ya? sheesh!


18. Bellatrix Lestrange left...
Tuesday, 11 September 2007 12:07 pm
U should be glad pple dun hiam u, still wanna hiam pple..... Give me your standard Where got Sexual connotations????????? I ish very clean one ok.. This is chewren friendly comment leh... Its all Jaywalk's fault lah say i into BDSM.. U know can liaos, still have to tell whole world meh... Cannot trust you with secrets one leh


19. JayWalk left...
Tuesday, 11 September 2007 1:44 pm :: 
Bellatrix: If maid chio, then I won't hiam lor. Simple as that.

That aside. This Gary really one kind. We all innocent innocent discussing Brisbane Destination Shipment Monitoring (BDSM) then this si gin nah come and kachow say dunno what sexual behavior.

Jialat man...... this little cheeko pervert.


20. Bellatrix Lestrange left...
Tuesday, 11 September 2007 4:45 pm
No need BDSM liaos.. Shipment Cleared liaos.. on its way to Cnee


21. Gary left...
Tuesday, 11 September 2007 5:42 pm
wahahahaha.. i never say you got sexual connotations.. got RQ protect can already..


22. JayWalk left...
Tuesday, 11 September 2007 6:24 pm
Bellatrix: Glad to hear that all is well. Hope you learn your lesson. Be nice to me and your shipments will clear.

Gary: You better be careful around here. Later RQ whip you jialat jialat, I also cannot save you liao.


23. Bellatrix Lestrange left...
Tuesday, 11 September 2007 10:47 pm
What??? I protect Jaywalk? For what? He dun need me to protect one lah.. By the way hor, I didn't talk to you for the whole of today the shipment cleared.. It means only 1 thing, u bring me bad luck... :P


24. JayWalk left...
Tuesday, 11 September 2007 11:08 pm :: http://jaywalk.blog-city.com
Bellatrix: Au contraire, mon cherie! It is because you were never mean to me for the whole of the day that resulted in shipment clearing smoothly.


25. Bellatrix Lestrange left...
Tuesday, 11 September 2007 11:09 pm
Remind me not to talk to you anymore.. Hahaha No talk = no need to be mean....
*starts ignoring Jaywalk....


26. JayWalk left...
Tuesday, 11 September 2007 11:15 pm :: 
Bellatrix: I expected that response coming from you. Sooooo predictable.

You can resist not kachowing me meh?


27. akk left...
Friday, 14 September 2007 10:45 am
One face for you...


but good write-up anyways.:)


28. JayWalk left...
Friday, 14 September 2007 1:32 pm :: 
akk: Er.... I have no idea what you just commented...
Posted by at No comments:

07 September 2007

Sian XMM Episode XI

I was having dinner the other night with Jean , Joyce, Lex and Gary at Marina South for steamboat.

We ate rather heartily until Jean complained that she better stop cause she felt that she was getting fat.  Joyce disagreed as she felt that Jean was nowhere near fat and sought me to side with on this opinion.
To which the following conversation ensued...

Joyce: Eh. *pointing at Jean*, she not fat right?

Jay: Aiyah.... one thing I learn is all girls think that they are fat one. Regardless. Even the anorexic and bulimic ones.

... then I went further with "exagerration mode" +ON to full power...

Jay: Even those African refugee women nothing to eat for days, weak until collapse on the floor liao....
Jay: *pause for effect* .... they will still ask "Am I fat?" *

Joyce: REALLY HAR?

It was an awkward silence for like half a second as Jean and I rolled eyes at each other.

* WIN *

Aiyoh... this girl har.... sibeh cute.....

* Ok ok.... I know it's very mean to be making fun of the refugees' plight. To that I am sorry. I take back all the Ethopian jokes as well. 

- Voxeros

1. Chocolate gal left...
Friday, 7 September 2007 1:50 pm
Every gal is fat... only difference is no weight fat or really fat or ok fat... as what u have said loh...


2. JayWalk left...
Friday, 7 September 2007 3:18 pm :: 
ChocGal: Exactly. Personally, I think a girl all skin and bones is rather off-putting.


3. Bellatrix Lestrange left...
Saturday, 8 September 2007 10:42 am
Your disclaimer put so small.. let Ant see ah ... well its true, women will never be satisfied with how skinny they are.... but i have like lotsa feed back from my guy friends that they prefer dunlopillo to boney bag of bones...


4. JayWalk left...
Saturday, 8 September 2007 3:46 pm :: 
RedQueen: Mai arh nee kuan kong. Text smaller is to differentiate from actual text of the entry mah.

I agree lah. You go langah Ms Boney-M hor, your downstair the front pelvic bone there next morning sure tio internal injury one lor.....


5. j0yz left...
Friday, 14 September 2007 12:37 am
that sotong does not look like me at all! it really looks very obscene!
=|


6. JayWalk left...
Friday, 14 September 2007 9:38 am :: 
Joyz: Ahh... welcome to the blog. It is only obscene only if you are thinking dirty. Oops....

Anyway, you are right. That sotong caricature doesn't look like you. I got a puffer fish (Fugu) drawn up liao.

You can go ask Lex what is a Fugu.
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06 September 2007

Who Is My MP Ah?


The Sunday morning that I was back in Singapore, we drove down to Ghim Moh market for breakfast. I was soooo looking to eating all the home food from Nasi Lemak to Otak to Prata to Kopi-O Gao.

As I was driving, my wife pointed to the banner on the lamp post.

Wife: Eh. I think I know who our MP is liao. *pointing at the banners*

Me: Who? (At this point, I haven't noticed the banners yet... my mind was preoccupied with all the food I was about to stuff myself with.)

Wife: Naaiiiirrrrr.... the Indian guy on the banner lor. That Tharman guy.

Me: Orh. Really har?

Wife: Yah. Yah. I think our constituency is Ulu Pandan. See the banner there say "Ulu Pandan". I think today is "MP Visit Ghim Moh" residents day or something.

Me: Ok, I learned something new today. All these days of walkovers and election boundaries anyhow draw here draw there, GRC anyhow sukah sukah zone here zone there. It is good to finally know who our MP is. I thought we last time is Ayer Rajah GRC one? Now back to Ulu Pandan har?


As it turned out, Mr Tharman Shamugaratnam was the VIP of the day and not our MP.

In other words, we still don't know who our MP is and one more thing....

..... we also don't know where we are as there is no such constituency named Ulu Pandan anymore.


- Voxeros

1. OLLie left...
Friday, 7 September 2007 12:31 am :: http://ooohlah.lah.cc
Wah lau. hahahahhahaa.. I know how to pronounce his full name sia. Tharman Sharmugaratnam (spelling correct or not I don't know). He came over to my school's opening ceremony and we had to listen to his name a zillion times.
Anyhow, I don't even know who's my MPs la. And I live in Singapore the whole time. But but but.. I know which constituency I'm from! Better than nothing la hor? =)))


2. JayWalk left...
Friday, 7 September 2007 9:17 am :: 
Ollie: His name isn't that difficult as long as you are able to break it down. It's quite a mouthful though, but it is still relatively easy for me.

I wanted to go find out what my constituency is but gave up the idea after like 1.3 seconds, thinking that they are going to rezone and rename it anyway. So why bother?


3. Old Beng left...
Friday, 7 September 2007 10:37 am
Ghim Moh, stayed there for 10 over years before moving out and still visit the hawker centre with my cha-bo-lang as it is only few minutes drive away from my current place.
Will buy you kopi-O gao if lim peh happen to bump into you


4. JayWalk left...
Friday, 7 September 2007 11:58 am :: 
Old Beng: On lah.... Christmas we go la kopi.


5. Old Beng left...
Friday, 7 September 2007 2:00 pm
Sure, we can la kopi, eat prata, sing carols.


6. JayWalk left...
Friday, 7 September 2007 4:10 pm :: 
Old Beng: Day time, Ghim Moh market sing carols, people think we siao. Speaking of siao, last time, there is this crazy woman roaming the market everyday, you know what I talking about?


7. Zhe Bin left...
Friday, 7 September 2007 7:08 pm
Eh... Your place should be under Holland-Bt Timah right?


8. JayWalk left...
Saturday, 8 September 2007 1:08 am :: 
ZheBin: After checking. Yeah. You are right. I am Bukit Timah/Holland.


9. Old Beng left...
Saturday, 8 September 2007 10:06 am
The woman who roamed around singing, yes I remembered her but are you referring to the mother or the daugther? Apparently, 2 also a little not so normal and I believe they are still there. They may be a little "xiao" but totally harmless :)


10. JayWalk left...
Saturday, 8 September 2007 10:34 am :: 
Old Beng: Wah kaoz.... there is 2 of them? I didn't know that! I supposed I refer to both of them bah...... have you ever seen two of them appearing together at the same time?

I moved to Ghim Moh side in 1980. I supposed it the mother that I have seen. She has a daughter? Who the hell is the father???


11. Old Beng left...
Saturday, 8 September 2007 6:40 pm
Yes, I have seen both of them together. The last time I saw them was like 1 year plus ago and usually it is the daughter who sings. My guess is that the mum is about 50+ and the daughter 30 +/-, me no good in guessing women's ages.

Who is the father? Not me!!!!!!! (Must faster clarify) Just joking la, I really don't know.
They are quite harmless except once I saw the mother scolding the daughter.


12. JayWalk left...
Sunday, 9 September 2007 2:26 am ::
Old Beng: Seriously if you ask me, I haven't the faintest idea if the one that I saw is mother or daugther.


13. Chocolate gal left...
Monday, 10 September 2007 11:07 pm
Sorry, the indian guy is my MP. jurong area one... hahha... But i never see him around one..


14. JayWalk left...
Tuesday, 11 September 2007 7:44 am :: 
Chocolate Gal: Since when you Jurong? I thought you Bukit Batok one?


15. Everton left...
Tuesday, 11 September 2007 10:00 am
Was the first photo taken near Ghim Moh Sec School? I liked eating at the hawker centers.


16. JayWalk left...
Tuesday, 11 September 2007 10:43 am :: 
Everton: If you look at the second picture, you will see a building with a blue roof in the background. That's Ghim Moh Secondary School. They have since built a multi-storey carpark in between.

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